#babyanddog

For those who follow my Instagram account, you would have known that I dedicated my account to capturing the relationship between my 11 month old Son and turning 2 year old puppy. My hope is that Anders learns how to love animals and the meaning of trust and loyalty through his interaction with Summer. 

Now there were 2 recent incidents which led me to blog about this topic in my almost non-existent blog. The first was a message I received from a stranger who followed my posts. She was 7 weeks pregnant and had a 4 months old shiba puppy. She wrote that she was very concerned about the puppy when she found out she was pregnant but upon seeing my photos, she began to believe that her puppy will also be able to love her baby. 

The second incident was a video I received from my Mother-in-law, of a baby crawling and touching a huge dog innocently in the kitchen. Judging from the way the baby approached the dog so comfortably, I assumed that that was not their first encounter. The dog looked at the baby and allowed the baby to touch his/her paws while the Mother continues to record the scene with her phone. Within just a split second and without any prior warning or signs, the dog snapped and grabbed the baby's head in his mouth and dashed off, while the Mother screamed in terror and the baby wailed in pain.

My first reaction to the video: my heart almost stopped beating and I shut it down immediately. The image haunted me throughout the day. And I began to question myself, is friendship between a dog and a baby purely a romanticised notion which the media has instilled upon us? A relationship between a canine and a tender baby, is that even possible? Am I putting Anders at risk?

I showed the video to my Husband, and he kept silent after watching it. We began to worry each time summer came close to Anders. We made summer sit far away from Anders. As much as Summer has been neglected due to our work routine, we began to exclude her more from our lives. 

One day when we were on our way to work, my husband asked me why is Summer behaving differently? She's no longer as excited as before. I told him I did not notice the difference. 

During lunch, I was surfing Facebook when my colleague tagged me in an old photo of summer when she was probably 3 months old. In that photo, she had a huge grin on her face. Then it hit me that I have not seen that grin for a while now. And the feeling of guilt and shame began to overwhelm me as I tried to recall the last time I had cuddled with her.

#babyanddog could really be just a romanticised notion all along. As a Mother, how can I ever put my baby at any possible risk not knowing for sure when Summer could or would snap like the dog in the video? But what about Summer? Am I less of a Mother to her than to Anders just because she is a dog? Will my initial love for her be replaced by the fear that she would one day harm Anders?

Difficult questions I have no answers to. It is easy to neglect a dog because they can't complain Nor voice out their sadness. It is easy to turn a blind eye to the dog especially when you are exhausted and all you want is sleep. When the dog's behaviour changes, we conveniently use that as an excuse to put her up for adoption or in some horrible cases, put her to sleep. 

No. That will not happen in my house. Forging #babyanddog may be really difficult at this stage when Anders is still very young. But I believe as he grows older, he will gain a Friend who will stay by his side for life. For that to happen, I must now play my part as a Mother to the both of them. 

To those out there who want the same thing in their household, I urge you to rethink and re-evaluate before bringing a puppy home. It is not all good and dandy, it is not a bed of roses as you have seen in the pictures. There are a whole lot of hard work, sweat and even tears in making it work. The lives of the canine are as precious as the lives of your babies.